If I don't write about trust right now, then I would be lying about where I am. In life. In love. In it all. It's all I've got right now, it's the thread that I'm holding onto because if I don't, I'm not sure what will happen....There's that tiny space where you actually have to choose between love and fear. It's a sliver of a space, because at any moment you can slip one way or the other with just a thought. My word for 2012 is Magic, and while it's been a very magic filled year in many ways, it makes me wonder if Trust may have truly been my word of the year. It has been permeating every area of my life. It's helped me to dig deep...to ask the big questions like ~
what can I trust? And there. With that question I catch my breath, it holds so much wisdom. Do you know that my answer could never be n o t h i n g. Because while I am fearful at times, needing work & money to pay the bills...Can I actually say that I trust Nothing? I can't. Because if I trust nothing, then I am not seeing a clear picture of what's happened in my life to this point.
I trust the love of my man, my dog, my close friends, my Mom, my Grandma. I trust that I have always been taken care of in one way or another, even if it wasn't always my version of perfect. I trust the beauty & power of the Ocean, and of the Moon. I trust my intuition, and in my passion to grow that gift. I trust that tonight I have a roof over my head. I trust that today I have running water. I trust in my ability to create ~ art, sacred spaces, food, writing, a beautiful life. I trust that
in this moment I am ok. I trust that it's alright for me to be learning to let others handle their own feelings, worries, stresses. I trust that I can communicate with guides, and unseen friends who are here to help guide me,
if I let them. I trust that today I have electricity which allows me to sit here and tap away on my laptop. I trust that I have leftovers in the fridge to eat for dinner tonight. I trust that I can have a conversation with my partner about our fears, and that we can be honest that some of those fears are more closely tied to
story, than reality. ::::: I could go on, because there is so much more.... Do you see the gift of that one little question?
It's here in this sliver of space that I choose to TRUST
(over and over and over) what I have, what I know & don't know, and where I'm going. At the end of this post, I'm so deeply feeling the connection of the two words. And I
think know you just witnessed me being lead to this place -
You can trust in magic. Now all I need to do is remember to get out of the way.
The ride, the journey, the tide.